Be aware that attention seekers find every way possible to share the drama around and draw attention to themselves. This includes going onto social media accounts, gossiping and being self-absorbed face-to-face, making phone calls, posting constant selfies and sending emails. All of these approaches can be responded to, or not, as you choose. Try not to take what they’re saying personally. Through their behavior, these people are actually revealing a wound or unmet need they’re dealing with.
Not agreeing with the person when he or she needles you to agree that what they’re going through is worse/better/scarier/more momentous than anything else possible. Actively disagreeing with broad-sweeping statements that they make about things not going well, by pointing out what is going right. Staying calm at all times, not raising your voice and not buying into the fear or anxiety that they’re trying to promote. Failing to turn up when called, asked for or begged for. Refuse to be the lapdog who quickly turns up to console the poor dear. Politely mention that less complaining tends to result in enjoying life somewhat more. Suggest that budgetary/medical/psychological or decluttering help might be the only real solution to the problems that constantly ail this person. Then provide the phone number of a reputable professional and refuse to engage any further. If the person keeps annoying you, mention something along the lines of “Confidence is silent, insecurities are loud”, then leave it at that.
If you get in trouble, walk up to that person and say “I’m not gossiping about you. All you want is attention and if you think that lying is an appropriate way to get people to listen, then I’m really not interested anymore. " Or, if this is because this person is wanting attention to make you look bad, tell the person he or she likes the truth. Say something like this: “If you don’t stop, I’m going to give you what you deserve, no friends. " You may sound mean, but that’s what they deserve. “If this is what you’re going to do, I’m going to tell everyone to stop being your friend if all you want is attention. "
Tell people who are good friends with this person that all the person wants is attention. They might not believe you, but give true reasons, do not embellish or fall into the trap of lying as well. If all you want to do is make this person look bad, you’re an attention seeker too. Remind yourself that all the reasons this person seeks attention for are all the reasons why they no longer have yours. Don’t strive to make your presence felt, as the drama queen or king does. Instead, be reassured that this person notices your absence. You matter, either with or without this person in your life.
These types of people need your compassion more than they need your judgment.
